The Same Argument - Advice
Posted: Tue Feb 02, 2010 2:43 amThe best advice for couples who argue all the time I could find in the internet is at www.counselling-directory.org.uk. In the advice, there are five elements, namely 5C's of successful marriage, that can be done to reduce the likelihood of arguing all the time and help couples come to a better place in their relationship.
The first element is that of communication. Misunderstanding is normally a major part in the breakdown of any relationship, and communication is the way to reduce the likelihood of it happening.
Secondly, compromise. At some point one or other partner is going to have to give way and concede on what they would prefer. And some times, both partners will have to give way. If one or other insists on having their own way, there will be problems which may well result in a breakdown of the relationship.
Thirdly, commitment. We all know what it is like to not want to do something, but having made a commitment we hold to our word. Couple relationships are no exception. There will undoubtedly be times when we don't ‘feel’ like making an effort – but will do so. And generally (though not always!) the more we give the more we receive!
Fourthly, celebration. One vital way of keeping a relationship alive is to celebrate it; share an activity together – seek to enjoy life and play together. This element becomes increasingly hard to achieve as the children start coming – but the best thing parents can give their children is a healthy stable relationship.
Finally, choice. Day by day, we make choices – and our relating to others is no exception. We can choose to invest time in someone, or to neglect and turn away from them; we can choose to put our partner or spouse first or to look only to our own interests; we can choose to clarify any apparent misunderstanding or to stubbornly refuse to talk it through.
The first element is that of communication. Misunderstanding is normally a major part in the breakdown of any relationship, and communication is the way to reduce the likelihood of it happening.
Secondly, compromise. At some point one or other partner is going to have to give way and concede on what they would prefer. And some times, both partners will have to give way. If one or other insists on having their own way, there will be problems which may well result in a breakdown of the relationship.
Thirdly, commitment. We all know what it is like to not want to do something, but having made a commitment we hold to our word. Couple relationships are no exception. There will undoubtedly be times when we don't ‘feel’ like making an effort – but will do so. And generally (though not always!) the more we give the more we receive!
Fourthly, celebration. One vital way of keeping a relationship alive is to celebrate it; share an activity together – seek to enjoy life and play together. This element becomes increasingly hard to achieve as the children start coming – but the best thing parents can give their children is a healthy stable relationship.
Finally, choice. Day by day, we make choices – and our relating to others is no exception. We can choose to invest time in someone, or to neglect and turn away from them; we can choose to put our partner or spouse first or to look only to our own interests; we can choose to clarify any apparent misunderstanding or to stubbornly refuse to talk it through.