The same argument

[monapyleung]

I have gone through a number of websites including:
christianadvice.net/christian_advice_noframes.htm
gottman.com/research/about/
marriageadvice.com
relationshipgold.com/Marriage/avoidfights.html
advice.lovedetour.com/tag/marriage
savethemarriage.com/blog/labels/free%20marriage%20advice

The best advice I found is from christianadvice.net. The Scripture has been used to demonstrate what is meant by a good relationship/marriage. Ephesians 5:25 says, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her.” Mark 10:45 says, “For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” If we could regard a relationship as a special gift from God, and treat it as a platform to express godly love to the loved one, with the attitude to serve not to be served, we would not come across so many disharmonies in our relationship matters. I have always reminded myself of various verses in the Bible which help me greatly to accept the pitfalls of the other one, and to forgive him of his small mistakes. It's a continuous learning process, to break and to heal.

The most interesting advice I think is from gottman.com It's the website of an institute called The Relationship Research Institute which was created to foster research on marriage, couples, parenting, and families.
Gottman, the founder, said people don't get married, make friends, or try to maintain ties with siblings to have those relationships fail. Yet many fail because people don't pay enough attention to the emotional needs of others. Gottman further said that his research also shows that bids and turns help regulate conflict between people. Many conflicts are about the "conversation that never took place but needed to," a conversation that was fundamentally about emotional connection. "I had one couple in counseling and the husband said his wife never checked the oil in her car. He thought she was careless, but it turned out that she never knew a car engine needed oil. I think it is the same with relationships," Gottman explained. "People don't know how to maintain relationships and there is a great deal of misinformation out there. A relationship is about these small moments, these bids and responses. It is the way intimacy and trust are built."

The worst advice I found was from an article extracted from advice.lovedetour.com/tag/marriage. Basically the author advised couples to
keep separate spending accounts. The author said that the honest truth is that often the best way to handle arguments about money is to agree to disagree. The author highly recommended keeping one’s own personal spending account so that each can spend his/her money as one sees fit. Although it's a practical advice that the author gave, I think the author needed to elaborate a bit more on this point so that the readers won’t think that they need to hide their spending pattern from their spouses or partners.

[monapyleung]

SENTENCE MAKING

-Debbie and Joe are on holiday. They are in a city they don't know, and they are lost.
"We have made the wrong choice to come to this city. We need to find a way to get to our hotel but we can’t even speak the language.”
(How could you make such a bad decision to come to this city we don’t know and can’t speak the language? You are the one to cause all these troubles.)

-Debbie and Joe are in their hotel and they have to catch a plane. Debbie is worried they are going to miss it. “
"We need to be quick as we do not know the traffic condition of this city at this time, we must allow additional time for the check out and possible traffic jam on the way to the airport.”
(Why guys are always so careless about timekeeping? You never care about the timing and always forget about the possibility of accidents. If we miss the plane you will certainly blame me!)

-Debbie and Joe sit down to watch TV, but they can't decide what programme to watch. “
"Darling, please make your choice, don’t just keep pressing on the remote control.”
(You are going to watch your soccer games anyway, why pretending to make a choice? And why guys always press on the remote control endlessly without making a choice?)

-Debbie's pet fish is behaving strangely, and she thinks they should take it to the vet.
“I need to take my fish to the vet today, would you mind going with me?”
(You never notice my fish is sick and you never bother to look after them in the first beginning. At least you can go with me to the vet to show a little bit of your care.)